I want you to know it took every drop of willpower inside myself to get on my bike and to go the entire fifteen miles rather than get dressed and go find an opened bar.
I’ve found myself so depressed i’m losing my determination…how can one vile person have this affect on people? I believe this burning pain in my arm is the same pain that was in my hip last week, is a manifestation of my anxiety of the upcoming days.
They want me to stick it out, saying she probably won’t be here long… but if i already feel this bad and i haven’t even seen her yet.. how can i survive? I just wanna lay in my bed and cry😭
Part of me thinks they’re right and if i suck it up everything will fall into place, but the rest of me is telling me to run.