A Thursday

If you would be a real seeker after truth, it is necessary that at least once in your life you doubt, as far as possible, all things.
-Rene Descartes

Dear Diary, good evening. Turns out mister crazy-pants, that kept bugging me in the mornings, wasn’t all wrong. Not any less irritating, stupid people disgust me. But this virus thing is real.

Over the past couple weeks the idiots of the world have been hoarding swaddle doodle (toilet paper) of all things! And allot of other things in the last week since towns have been closing down.

Mind you, this is an upper respiratory virus, what the hell does swaddle doodle have to do with that? My mom started posting memes about that a month ago, I thought she’d fallen off her rocker. That’s what I get for not watching news.

So here we are on day four of medical martial law. This is my third day getting up and working out and biking AND taking all my supplements. Also on a sidenote, it’s my 335th dry day.

TJ got up with me this morning and he biked while I lifted weights.  He went ten miles! Then I biked while he watered his plants around the house.

This worldwide lockdown is a little bit disconcerting. I find myself wondering if I will ever actually see my dream come true.

I feel like I have something to contribute to the world that may never be. So many conspiracy theories out there. So many unknowns. It’s frightening.

I notice I spend a good portion of my days trying to convince myself that all this chaos during this pandemic is temporary. Part of me believes that, part of me does not.


Katja called me crying about her mouth hurting because the filling fell out of the tooth that they did a root canal in about a year ago. TJ went and took her to the emergency dentist.

Just as I am about to step in the shower my watch zings me. It’s the dentists office.

Receptionist: You just dropped Katja off with us here at Citizenry Dental?

Me: Yea, what’s wrong?

Receptionist: Nothing, I’m just calling to let you know she’s done.

Me: What? She’s done? Already!? She literally just got there!

Receptionist: Yes, she can explain it to you when you see her.

Me: Uh, okay then.

I call TJ, hoping he has his phone with him because he’s probably not gotten far from their office.

He answers and says he’ll head back, he is only about five minutes away.

They arrive just after I’m out of the shower and dressed.

Me: What did they say?

Katja: They wouldn’t even see me. They gave me an appointment for May. They said they only see emergencies right now and this isn’t an emergency. She’s crying.

Me: How is it not an emergency? They couldn’t see your filling is missing? See that you’re in pain?

Katja: They didn’t even look in my mouth. First they said I never had a root canal on that tooth or any work done on that tooth at all, at that. The nurse looked at my last xray and they realized I had, but said they aren’t bothering the doctor for non-emergencies.

Me: It is a fucking emergency.

Katja: She said it’s not infected so it’s not an emergency.

Me: So they did do an exam?

Katja: No. They only looked at the last x-ray.

Me: Then how can they possibly know there’s no infection?… I’ll go get some tooth medicine when TJ’s done burning the burnables. Maybe you can saturate some gauze and stuff it in there.

Katja: Mom, it hurts so bad, I can’t stand it, I literally want to die. She’s pretty close to bawling. I can’t believe they didn’t fucking do anything.

Me: I’m so sorry Katja, I don’t know what else to do other than get some good tooth medicine. And take 1,000 mg Tylenol and 800 mg Motrin together. Maybe, if you keep going every day they’ll see you just to get you to quit coming in.

I don’t know what to do. I don’t understand how it couldn’t be an emergency. They’re the ones that did the bleeding root canal in the first place.

An unsupervised student did her root canal in FOUR two-hour appointments. And now that she’s in excruciating pain, because of them, they do nothing.

I’m thinking they’re doing shit work, period. I had a filling put in around the same time and it fell out about six months ago. It’s super annoying, I have to brush frequently to keep food out of it. God forbid it actually starts hurting, takes about 3-4 months to get into the dentist.

I had a cleaning mid February, I told them about it then. I said, and I quote. “I didn’t bother calling you guys because it doesn’t hurt yet so I knew you wouldn’t care. “

She pretty much brushed it off. Ah well, I knew they wouldn’t care, lol. She scheduled me for a filling late May.

Most all the doctors here are lacking in the intelligence department. Most of them are incompetent and or arrogant. My primary is both. I dislike him so much that I self diagnose and find ways to cure myself, just so I don’t have to see him.

Anyway, I went on Citizenry Dental’s Facebook page, funny they have a post about being opened for emergencies. So I wrote them a nice post.

My daughter went in because the filling came out of the root canal you did and it is excruciating.
Pain relievers and her temp filling from Walmart is no longer helping, at what point will it be considered an emergency?”

I found some Red Cross tooth pain liquid at Riteaid that you dip a teeny sponge in and put it in the tooth hole. Hopefully that brought her some relief. I have not heard anything from her for the last couple hours.


I’m lying in bed watching M*A*S*H. I use to hate this show, now I find it to be one of my favourites. It’s almost therapeutic.

Hopefully tomorrow I have something exciting and fun to write about!

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